I'm sorry my penis didn't work
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Just high enough for therapy.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
