didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
