i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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