I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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