you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
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