Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
