the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
