it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
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