i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
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