grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
