Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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