I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize
