I looked at my own cervix.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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