I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Randomize