dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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