just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
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I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
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Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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