remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
did i just pee glitter
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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