Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Randomize
