The maid of honor just puked.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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