it wasn't lemon gatorade
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
