Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
