i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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