so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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