love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
