he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
