forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
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