Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Randomize