We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Shame is for Republicans.
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