Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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