Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
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