I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
