would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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