I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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