My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
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I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
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I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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