So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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