My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
