I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize