Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
