Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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