marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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