I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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