Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Randomize
