i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize