Me too!
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Randomize
