i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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