your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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