If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
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