RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
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