bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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