No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
