The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
